Friday, May 21, 2010

The old saying goes: never lend a friend money (and other rantings of a lunatic)

So my husband and I have these friends...Ian and Kim. Eric used to work with Ian, and Kim and I have become very good friends by our husbands hanging out together often.

Long story short, Eric lent Ian about $70. Ian promised to pay Eric by a certain time, but wasn't able to live up to that promise. It's not the first time either. In the past, when he owed Eric money they worked out some sort of bartering for computer parts, car race tickets, or some such nonsense so that Ian didn't have to pay cash money back, but Eric felt he got a fair deal out of the arrangemnet so it was all good. This time, there would be no bartering. Eric wanted to be paid cash money and Ian didn't have it by the promised date. It almost cost them their friendship. Eric would go on and on about how crappy it was for Ian to flake out and not pay as promised...and all the while, all I could think is: What a hypocrite!

You see, I guess it was ok that Eric didn't pay me the measley $125 that he gives me per month to help out with all the bills. (oh, he pays the ATT Uverse bill which is about $200/month, but that wasn't MY choice to set that up...it was his. Told him he could do whatever with the satelite/cable/uverse...he's paying the bill!) But I pay everything else. He pays me $125/month to help out...that doesn't even buy one week's worth of groceries, or the electric bill, or the cell phone bill. Don't get me wrong, it HELPS, but it's not nearly enough for all the expenses we have.

I make more money than he does, but he blows alot of his money, which infuriates me. I scrimp and penny-pinch and he buys ghosthunting gear or nascar tickets. Just last night he was looking for MMA tickets (mixed martial arts) ... while I'm trying to find a solution to how I'm going to NOT live on my credit cards. I really REALLY don't want to have to get a second job...and shouldn't have to :(

I feel like he's such a hypocrite and I just have no idea who he is anymore. He has to be on the go and spending money ALL THE TIME. I finally just told him, "you know, it sucks that Ian isn't paying you by the agreed upon date." Then I inserted sarcastic analogy to what Eric does to me here saying, "I hate when someone promises to pay you and they don't." (man, that felt so good!) Went on to say, "But it's not worth ruining your friendship over. If you don't like that he keeps doing this to you when he borrows money, then DON'T LEND HIM ANYMORE MONEY! You know he's good for it, and eventually you'll be paid, so chill out!" >.<

I'm so tired of his double standards in every aspect of his life I can hardly stand it anymore. Everything he does is ok if he does it (and/or benefits from it), but if I do (or anyone else does) the same thing, he gets all bent out of shape.

I guess the thing that bothers me the most...he HAS money tucked in savings for Stephanie to just SPEND. It's not saving for her college, her first car, or new clothes, it's her "allowance" and he builds it up for her and allows her to just SPEND it. Now this 12 year old has a digital camera, a Ninetendo SP, a Ninetendo DS, (wants a DSi *rolls eyes*), a computer in her room, tons of PC games, a modified x-box with a bajillion burned games...yet needs money to SPEND??

He put off ordering her a new pair of glasses when she LOST hers after sleeping over at a friend's and having them less than 2 weeks! because he didn't have the money. Uh...take it from her SPENDING money?!?! She NEEDS glasses, she doesn't NEED anything "fun". Everything she has, it's not enough. She goes around saying "I'm bored" all the time, which is enough to drive me absofuckinglutely bonkers.

There's just no sense of priority or of responsibilty to be more contributory to our household needs. And I think I'm just fed up. His rant about Ian not paying him really got to me...I fear it won't be long before I absolutely lose it.

Ian and Kim are like family to me now, and they treat me like I'm part of their family. I'd do anything to help them out if I could and I know they'd do the same for me (already have on some ocassions!)...I just couldn't believe he could be so apathetic toward them...and over $70 bucks??

It's really odd...the folks he should be connected to the most, family close friends, are the ones he craps on. His "friends" that I would call acquaintences, or his "friends" that I would call co-workers, he'll do just about anything for.

Maybe it's just me, but I really don't see how you're allowed to shit all over the folks that care about you the most, but bend over backwards to help out someone you barely know, but talk to on a semi-regular basis.

I am sick of seeing status updates by him on facebook and blackberry chat that are obviously meant for others. He tries to play it off, but I'm not stupid. He can't email me, call me, or text me...but he can update his facebook or blackberry messenger status regularly.

I'm the devil and "neglecting" him when I'm on the computer, but he's on until all hours of the night every day and that's ok. Tonight is the first night in over 3 weeks that I've been up past 10:30 and on the computer. I go to bed without him, and wake up to him groping me? I think not, sir. I'm NOT a morning person, and contrary to what ANYONE says...morning sex is NOT good. Bedtime sex is sexy and relaxing...morning sex is rushed, and full of morning breath.

Wow...I need to change the title to the post...how did we get here with this conversation?!?! LOL

Sure sign I better get to bed. Work in the morning and I fear it will be long weekend of aggravation and frustration. Best to get it started and overwith (as Michael Scott says) "ASAP as possible"!

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